Great read thanks, really unpacked something that’s always there but not obvious to most people so thank you. Your comment about exciting lives US v Irish edition I found very interesting. I’ve realised I was raised in a family where the guys did cool stuff and were the exciting ones and the women were the support crew who went along for the ride and kept the wheels oiled, until they fell off due to the guys’ recklessness (I see now as an adult). My internalised message from that was to find the right guy who was interesting enough to take you the places you wanted to go, which as you can imagine lead to a lot of frustration, passive aggressive manipulation, and a lot of different guys who didn’t live up to expectation/’their potential’. Doh! Own goal. Thank you fir this eye opener. Wish could follow you individually but will keep and eye out for more.